Calling All Critiques: Entry #14

This is the last 500-word critique, so come on out and participate! Just a a few minutes of your time and a comment to help an indie author improve his Science Fiction work. Thanks in advance!

Proof Positive

This is the final day of 500 word excerpts for Calling All Critiques! Thank you to all who participated – we hope you found the critiques you received useful. Next week we’ll have book covers in need of critiques, so stay tuned!

Don’t forget to enter our raffle to win a $10 Amazon gift card, an eCopy of It Ain’t Easy Being Jazzy by Quanie Miller, and an eCopy of Guarding Angel by S. L. Saboviec. This is your last chance!

http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/6928ae2/

And now, on to the final critique.

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Author: Robert L. Slater
Website: www.desertedlands.com
Genre: YA/Adult Science Fiction
Entry:

*STRAIGHT INTO DARKNESS*
A Deserted Lands novel*.*

LIZZIE SLUNK BETWEEN THE CIRCLES of lights on the snow-scattered streets. The night’s cold bit at her through the layers of clothing she’d added after escaping. Her second day of freedom—slept away in an uncollected house—faded into the past. Happy Belated-f___ing Birthday, Lizzie. Now someone followed…

View original post 489 more words

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